


If someone else believed, would that make it real?

by Darkhorse



Series: Jean's Wish [1]
Category: Les Misérables - All Media Types
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mpreg, dreamed of, pretended mpreg, sadfluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-28
Updated: 2013-09-28
Packaged: 2017-12-27 21:24:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,609
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/983785
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Darkhorse/pseuds/Darkhorse
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>For Kink Meme prompt<br/>Valjean desperately wants to be pregnant and have a child but can't. When he admits this to Javert, Javert plays along.</p>
            </blockquote>





	If someone else believed, would that make it real?

Something was the matter. Javert shot another surreptitious look sideways, temporarily ignoring the notes he was supposed to be making for the trainee officer's lecture in the morning and concentrating on his partner. Jean would normally have noticed within seconds that he was being watched and glance over, a legacy fro the life of fear he'd lived all this time. But not tonight, tonight he was staring at nothing, clearly in another world. Javert frowned, pointedly upsetting the pen pot on his desk. Jean might have flicked an ear, but again, normally he'd jump a mile. Javert found he'd startled himself more by his actions than the other man  
“Jean?”  
The older man twitched, as if coming out of a dream, and looked over, his eyes still slightly unfocussed, and filled with sadness. Javert cast one more look at the paper on the desk, and decided that the trainees could put up with him working on spur of the moment, they needed to get used to being given rapid changes anyway, it was what happened on patrol. He stood up, crossing the distance to where Valjean was perched in a few long-legged strides and sat down next to him  
“What is it?”  
Valjean looked at his hands “You'd think me silly, deluded.”  
Javert gave a harsh bark of laughter, softening it, as he only would for this man, with a slight smile, tell me what it is, and I'll tell you whether you're silly, white-locks.”  
Valjean managed a tiny smile in return, looking up to catch his eyes for a brief, too brief moment. He opened his mouth, made an indistinct nose and shut it again “No, you'll think I'm going barmy.”  
“I don't think that already?” Javert raised an eyebrow, archly imitating one of his old bosses.  
There was a moment of silence as Jean appeared to grapple with his tongue and his words. Then he took a deep breath, two and got it out  
“I wish I had a child.”  
“You've had Cosette, for years and years.”  
Jean sighed “Yes but... All the time I knew she was not mine, that I lived a lie when-ever I called her daughter and she called me Papa. There are bonds, that only blood relationship could create, Javert.”  
Javert found himself shifting, fully aware that he could never, would never understand what Jean was getting at. There was no affection in him for his blood-parents, only a deep anger and bitterness. But for his birth, he might yet be something better.  
“A child, all my own, all our own. But, biologically, it is impossible, so I shall just have to live on dreams.” Javert watched his partner's head droop, his voice growing quieter into silence. He pressed his lips together, thinking. Of it's own accord, his hand slid over to rest on Jean's covering it completely, and he found himself leaning over to press a kiss to the other man's neck, murmuring.  
“What if you could forget it was a dream?”Jean jerked, clearly startled, and Javert held the questioning eyes that locked onto his “What if someone else believed, would that make it real?”  
Slowly, Jean nodded. Javert pressed a kiss to his lips, leading into a deep one, closing the final gaps of air between them so they were pressed together. He felt Jean's arms come around his back, grasping firmly but gently, holding him close. When he had to break the kiss, it was simply for air. He cupped Jean's face with one hand, tenderly “You would be a fine parent.”  
Jean shoved his shoulder as he tried to gain another kiss, pulling a very bad mock glare “And you would be too strict, the poor little scrap would be terrified.”  
Javert huffed “Nothing wrong with discipline and good behaviour.”  
Jean kissed him again, tactfully avoiding answering, Javert noticed. This time he did pull away, he wasn't going to be bribed into silence “I only hope he wouldn't have your talent for slipping through nets.”  
“Why would it be a HE, Javert, what's wrong with a girl.” Valjean was smiling at him, teasing now   
“I don't understand them.”  
Another kiss, this one on his cheek “You'd learn, if it was yours”   
He waited, feeling Jean had more to say   
“I wouldn't mind either, if it had your eyes”  
Javert pushed the other man flat on the sofa “What's wrong with yours?”  
Jean stroked his cheek, smiling up at him softly “Yours are more beautiful, so expressive, I can see right to your heart if I try.”  
Javert frowned, no wonder the criminals had found him easy meat few times “Then I definitely don't want them to have mine.”  
“Killjoy” But oddly enough Valjean didn't thump him, as he might have normally, instead laying still and continuing to smile dreamily up at him.   
Javert found a soft smile wriggling its way onto his own face, though he tried to suppress it initially, old habits died very hard, especially for police officers. His hands were on Jean's shoulders now, bracing himself up off the other man's body, but he let one slide, first to gently nudge Jean's nose, as the man used to do to Cosette when she was sad, then to rest back on the strong chest “I wouldn't care what they looked like Jean, boy girl, your eyes or mine, as long as they have your heart, augmented with some common sense, please god.” He lowered his head to drop a kiss on Valjean's lips “Then I will love them to the best of my ability.” Beneath him Jean shifted, probably to stop his leg going dead from being pinned under Javert's. Javert let him move, following and rocking slightly, before dropping back down for another kiss. That was when one of his arms gave up, and he would have rolled onto the floor if Jean hadn't still had an arm resting over his back. He felt silly laughter bubble up as he was pressed close by accident, kicking his legs off the sofa and down into a strange kind of half kneel next to the other man. Jean followed him with a movement of his head, reluctant to break the kiss, and the hand which had been his brace seconds before slid forward, down his arm, stroking over the contours. Then it glided upwards and he felt it tangle in his hair, holding him to the kiss. He leant back into it, drawing Jean up like a magnet to keep the contact. But after a moment the older man drew away, giving Javert a critical look up and down  
“Yes, your eyes definitely.”  
Javert kissed him purely to shut him up.

The sheets were warm, the sun had been streaming through the window all day and the covers had been back for most of that. Their was no shock as they fell together, tangle of arms and two bodies together. Javert knew his eyes tonight shone with love not lust, and that there was a distinct difference between the two. He'd never truly understood that before he met Jean. His hand's roamed the other man's body, lightly gently. If he tried, if he abandoned all logic, he could see a heavy round on his partner’s stomach, a contented rosiness that was ten times the joy in those eyes. A child, even unborn, would suit Jean well. And more logically it would give him something to concentrate on, to live for. He started dropping kisses to hide his thoughts. Jean had been miserable for a while after Cosette married and moved away, and Javert wasn't such a dreamer as he was playing at now. He knew inside that anyone of the shifts he took, any day, any night, could end on the end of a knife or caught by a bullet. Jean needed something, someone else to love in his life.  
He kissed his partner hard on the mouth, rocking gently until Jean caught the rhythm. Slow and gentle tonight, but that didn't mean he would surrender the lead, the control. Let Jean dream his heart out under caresses, it was what he needed.

They lay curled up together, two fitting pieces  
“Jeanne for a girl. For a boy...”  
“Not Philippe or Stefan, I categorically forbid it....Nor Louis either.”  
“Pierre... Francois...Francois. That would be a good name” A heavy sigh wrenched itself out of Valjean's chest, giving Javert a split second warning “Or it would be, if there was even the slightest chance of it happening... But as Cosette's first biology teacher said, “Men can't bear babies...So it never will.”  
He pulled his partner close letting Jean press up against him like a child “Never say never till the cows come home, Jean.”  
“Cows can't alter human workings” Rough shudders wracked through Jean's frame as he began to sob, and Javert noticed one of the man's hand creeping down to press on his stomach. “I just...Just wanted it, still want it, so much...so so much.  
Javert kissed the white hair, holding the pressure a moment longer than he would normally as he rubbed gentle circles on jean's back “I know...I know.” He couldn't claim to understand, but he knew the hole in Jean's heart, knew that even with their game, it had not been filled. Uselessness, was not an emotion Javert was accustomed to, but he felt it now. Jean had been, would be, a fine parent, yet he could not have one he would love, while monsters like that Thenardier woman, not fit to raise a slug, could. Biological determination could be harsh, could be downright unjust, in some manners.


End file.
